Marriage Is Three Parts Love, Seven Parts Forgiveness

– by Michelle Du Toit

Three parts representing the perfection of love in the Trinity and seven parts representing perfect forgiveness. When I was newly married I focused more on the perfect love, but now I find the seven parts, the more difficult part of marriage to maintain. Thinking on 3 parts love: 1 – It is not all about you, you are two people. “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement…” – Romans 12:3. 2 – Love bears with one another, we are human. “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” – Eph 4:2. 3 – Love accepts without the requirement to change. “Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking…” – 1 Cor 13:5. 7 Parts Forgiveness: 1 – Saying I am sorry is the start of forgiveness. “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other…” – James 5:16. 2 – Blaming is a strategy for avoiding your own responsibility. 

It is easier to blame than admit to fault. “Do not judge…Do not condemn… Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” – Luke 6:37. 3 – You have a share of blame in every situation. Make things right. “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar … go and be reconciled to them…” – Matt 5:23-24. 4 – Old hurts will talk eventually, if not forgotten. “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart…the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” – Luke 6:45. 5 – What is not forgotten poisons everything that remains, until destroyed! “See to it that…no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” – Heb 12:15. 6 – Don’t destroy what is good, in light of the slight. Don’t end good strategies to maintain the marriage, based on recent wrongs. (The unmerciful servant – Matt 18:21-35). 7 – Leave the past, focus on the future. “See, the former things have taken place, and new things I declare; before they spring into being I announce them to you.” – Isaiah 42:9.

JOY! Magazine (October 2017)

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